[mood]: overwhelmed. yearning still. happier.
[music]: there's one love in a lifetime, there's two hearts of a kind, there's three reasons you'll be mine, there's five or six ways through seven days without you...yeah so avion. and the cure is my savior, pictures of you came on followed exactly by just like heaven, and i realized what a dork i've been. and also of course the august and everything after album--counting crows, the new pornographers, postal service, twin falls--ben folds five, crash--dmb, collide--howie day, sleeps with butterflies--tori amos, the scientist--coldplay because it's amazing, yeah.
[countdown]: eight days left?!!?!

so yeah i deleted the post i had before.
this week has been rough, well monday-wednesday was, but today got better.
i'm an idiot.
i can't afford to be bothered by people at the end of the year...
especially people who only care about me and want to just tell me they love me. i can't just blow them off for that.
everyone come to the enloe vs. green hope game, saturday @ enloe, 4.30. $5 to get in, except they may not charge since it's state tournament games now...?? who knows.
i'm excited for saturday night studying. and shea's party. and alex's party.
and, yeah.
life's good.
today was finally better.
really.
i'm so sorry for all the stupid things i've been thinking, even though half of them, or more like 99% of them, you'll never know. but i want you to know i love you with all my heart and that could never change. that's directed to so many people in one way and then...one person in another. you guys are amazing.
things made me happy today, like the fact that i definitely said what needed to be said in art class, right cam. and i tried to mooch off of people in the slushy line and all i got out of it was a quarter and a single rose, not a slushy. oh well. and i love my biology class.

wow, i just wanted to let everyone know i talked to today:
i love you.
no joke, each and every person.
and even one i didn't talk to today.
even though i really need to, i think i righted my world by myself.
with the help of...everyone i talked to. whether you guys did it knowingly (alex, shea) or not (adam, mulhern)
and the real countdown: fourteen days.

out of the doubt that fills my mind, i somehow find you and i collide.